Thoughtful Thursday: Celebrating Life After Losing a Loved One

Today is a very special day. I had no intention of writing about it, but sometimes ignoring fear or pain can be worst than just facing it.

Oct 11, 2012 would have marked the 28th Birthday of one of the most fearless, loving and shining spirits I've ever known. Her name was Emily, and she was my best friend.

Emily left hundreds of family and friends behind they day she decided to take her own life. That day I lost a piece of my heart.

Though I have not heard her voice in over 3 years the energy of her laugh and smile is still in the forefront of my mind. Her photos and impromptu gifts are placed all over my home, a constant reminder that though her physical being is no longer in my life, she will never truly be gone.

I've experienced a spectrum of emotions over the last 3 years--- rage, guilt, sadness, betrayal, acceptance, but most of all love. When all other feelings have come and gone my love for her, and for our friendship shines brighter than anything else.

Getting Ready on My Wedding Day

My tears are not for what I've lost, but the blessing that I gained by having her in my life. The way she opened her arms to anyone in need, they way she accepted me and ALL my flaws, the way she loved her family, and the way she wanted to conquer the world with her positive, spunky, and beaming light are all things I wish to emulate.

Because of her I've learned not to take those I care about for granted. I've learned that family is not always related by blood. I've also learned that just because your loved one has left this earth doesn't mean they can't still be a constant part of your life.

I pass this photo  in my hallway everyday, my 2 soul sisters.

So today I don't mourn Emily's death. I celebrate her birth, our never-ending love, unconditional friendship, and all the ways I intend to make her proud.

Love and light from Granolaville,

Posted in: death,friendship,grief,loss,love,thoughtful thursday